我同意分手，但你不能找別人！?。?/title><meta name="description" content="學員：學長你好，男朋友最近和我提分手，我盡力的勸說自己放棄。在最開始，真的很想挽回，甚至不惜代價，只要他能回到我身邊，現(xiàn)在看來強扭的瓜可能真的不甜，說不愛是假的，但我可以同意分手，只是不想他去找新歡。這種情況，我該怎么辦？這是一種什么心理呢？" /><meta name="keywords" content="" /> <script type="application/ld+json">{ "@context": "https://ziyuan.baidu.com/contexts/cambrian.jsonld", "@id": "http://www.motor-park.com.cn/219502.html", "appid": "4ryTidmMDAYOxvtE", "title": "我同意分手，但你不能找別人?。?！", "images": [""], "description": "學員：學長你好，男朋友最近和我提分手，我盡力的勸說自己放棄。在最開始，真的很想挽回，甚至不惜代價，只要他能回到我身邊，現(xiàn)在看來強扭的瓜可能真的不甜，說不愛是假的，但我可以同意分手，只是不想他去找新歡。這種情況，我該怎么辦？這是一種什么心理呢？", "pubDate": "2024-04-17T15:43:24", "upDate": "2024-04-17T15:43:24", }</script><link rel="pingback" href="http://www.motor-park.com.cn/xmlrpc.php"><meta name='robots' content='max-image-preview:large' /><link rel='stylesheet' id='dashicons-css' href='http://www.motor-park.com.cn/wp-includes/css/dashicons.min.css?ver=6.8.3' type='text/css' media='all' /> <script type="text/javascript" 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class="tooltip be-btn-beshare be-btn-link be-btn-link-b use-beshare-link-btn" rel="external nofollow" onclick="myFunction()" onmouseout="outFunc()"><span id="wsstnmvt" class="sharetip bz copytip">復制鏈接</span></a> <a class="tooltip be-btn-beshare be-btn-link be-btn-link-l use-beshare-link-btn" rel="external nofollow" onclick="myFunction()" onmouseout="outFunc()"><span id="wsstnmvt" class="sharetip bz copytipl">復制鏈接</span></a></div></div></div><div class="wsstnmvt" id="primary" class="content-area no-sidebar"><main id="main" class="be-main site-main p-em" role="main"><article id="post-219502" class="post-item post ms"><header class="entry-header entry-header-c"><h1 class="entry-title">我同意分手，但你不能找別人?。?！</h1></header><div id="wsstnmvt" class="entry-content"><div id="wsstnmvt" class="begin-single-meta begin-single-meta-c"><span id="wsstnmvt" class="single-meta-area"><span id="wsstnmvt" class="meta-date"><time datetime="2024-04-17 15:43:24">2024年4月17日</time></span><span id="wsstnmvt" class="meta-cat"><a href="http://www.motor-park.com.cn/uncategorized/" rel="category tag">未分類</a></span><span id="wsstnmvt" class="comment"><a href="http://www.motor-park.com.cn/219502.html#respond"><i class="be be-speechbubble ri"></i><span id="wsstnmvt" class="comment-qa"></span><em>評論</em></a></span><span id="wsstnmvt" class="views"><i class="be be-eye ri"></i>163</span><span id="wsstnmvt" class="word-time"></span></span></div><span id="wsstnmvt" class="s-hide" title="側(cè)邊欄"><span id="wsstnmvt" class="off-side"></span></span><div id="wsstnmvt" class="single-content"><div id="wsstnmvt" class="bpp-post-content"><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">感情是兩個人的舞臺劇，少了一個人故事就不再完整，當你愛一個人的時候吸進去那么多勇氣，當你愛的人不愛你時，最后吐出來的都是嘆息。</span>最近學長接到了一個女生的求助。</span><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p>學員：學長你好，男朋友最近和我提分手，我盡力的勸說自己放棄。在最開始，真的很想挽回，甚至不惜代價，只要他能回到我身邊，現(xiàn)在看來強扭的瓜可能真的不甜，說不愛是假的，但我可以同意分手，只是不想他去找新歡。這種情況，我該怎么辦？這是一種什么心理呢？</span><span id="wsstnmvt" class="beupset17">文章源自懂愛網(wǎng)-http://www.motor-park.com.cn/219502.html</span><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"></span><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">聽了學員的困惑，學長能夠理解她的心理，就好比一個心愛的東西，我們自己沒有能力得到，也不想被別人擁有一樣。在感情里，出現(xiàn)這種情況，一般是有這三個原因。</span><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;text-align: center;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">憤怒</span><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;text-align: justify;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">在我們漫長的一生中，有些時刻我們會因為無法對一個人發(fā)泄憤怒而將這種情緒升級成對他的恨意。也就是我們所說愛的越深，恨的也越深，因為人對自己付出精力、時間、情感的東西，在未得到心理滿足時，會產(chǎn)生情緒化。</span><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;text-align: justify;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"></span><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;text-align: justify;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">對于對方提出的分手，你本身是不愿意的，你可能想“憑什么”“為什么”，有數(shù)據(jù)表明，約25%的憤怒事件會讓人想報復。</span><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;text-align: justify;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">你可以同意分手，卻不讓他找新歡，這就是折磨和束縛他的方式啊，同時你也是這樣來宣泄內(nèi)心的不甘。一位專門從事憤怒心理研究的博士Charles Spielberger說，“憤怒是一種情緒狀態(tài)，有從輕度刺激到強烈的憤怒的不同程度”。</span><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;text-align: justify;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">它會在我們認為自己被傷害了，被背叛的時候被觸發(fā)，也會因為巨大的壓力或與對方爭吵而觸發(fā)，也可能因為自己的自卑心而觸發(fā)。比如在你付出的感情中，你對他那么好，竟然求他都不留下來，當自己長時間得不到滿足，會對自己的行為產(chǎn)生憤怒。</span><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;text-align: justify;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"></span><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;text-align: center;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">占有欲</span><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">占有欲強的人</span>對自己喜愛的東西會很珍惜，只允許自己觸碰，別人就算靠近一點都會不爽。</span><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"></span><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">自己一旦擁有過的一切人和事物都不允許從手中逃走。</span><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">有很強的領地意識，不希望有不熟的人進入自己的家里。</span><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">想要獨占自己喜愛的人和事物。</span><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">占有欲在愛情這方面來講，表現(xiàn)的是介意伴侶和異性有接觸。</span>愛情占有欲只能代表一個人的心理。</span><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">也就是說雖然你表面上說同意分手，但是內(nèi)心卻不愿意。你還是覺得前任還是屬于自己的，不想別人觸碰。占有欲是人類在有了等級之后，人所有欲望中最高的欲望，它可以補償人的孤獨感。</span><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">在對方提分手后，也就是冷落了你，再也收不到對方的消息的關(guān)心，孤獨感的增加，更加讓你潛意識認為他不能有新歡，一旦有了就真正的失去對方了。</span><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"></span><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;text-align: center;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">嫉妒心</span><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">“一種極想排除或破壞別人的優(yōu)越地位的心理傾向?！?/span><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">你想和我分手，你不想讓我好過，你也不要過得好。因為這種心理，你會失去對理性思維的控制，讓沖動主宰你的行為，隨后就會做出一些事后令自己后悔的事。比如分手時的大鬧，令彼此難堪，再也無法挽回。</span><p style="padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">看到得不到對方了，嘴上同意分手，卻不甘心。</span><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"></span><p>所以當愛人要分手，不是他的行為傷害了你，而是這個行為讓你感受到被“背叛”的情緒，這個情緒令你難看和痛苦，使得你產(chǎn)生想要“報復”的心理。</span><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"></span><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em">美國心理學家托馬斯·摩爾說：你要理解你的憤怒，最終才能觸及它的核心。如果你確切地知道什么讓你生氣、你在和誰生氣，你就能清楚自己的立場與事情的重點，以及該如何在情感上加以處理。</span><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"></span><p style="letter-spacing: 1px;line-height: 1.75em;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 1em"><p style="max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;text-align: center;padding-left: 1em;padding-right: 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